Snow day! I wish it was of the “let’s go sledding and then drink mulled wine and watching Christmas movies in front of a fire kind.”
I have to work.
I keep having flashbacks that have come with the change in season and weather. The cold reminds me of the smell of smoke from people’s fires, and fireworks, and snow, and breathing steamy breaths into the cold air, and stews, and candles, and dark nights, and cuddles on the sofa, and Christmas. Definitely Christmas, which makes me miss my family lots and lots.
I live about fifteen minutes away from my parents and grandparents, which is where I need to be to function. I’m not that sort of girl who can cast aside her family, I love them far too much. But I miss my aunties and uncles and, of course, little cousins. I say little, but the youngest is four and the rest, well the second eldest of our clan (after me, taking the lead at almost 23) is my brother, who is nearly 20, then everyone else works their way down, but these little babies are now almost grown up.
It’s nice in a way, because I’ve felt like a spare adult for the last few years, and now, as time passes, they’ll all start to join me in Grown Up Land. You don’t have much in common when one of you has a job and a house and the others are having the best time of their lives being teenagers and starting university. Though I don’t want any of them to grow up too soon and miss out on being a young person, because it’s bloody brilliant.
I just hope, especially for Gramps’ sake and his camera, that we still get to meet up sometimes to take the Big Cousin Photograph - the one where he lines us up in height order (I always used to be at the back right in the middle, but at 5”6 I seem to be one of the smaller ones now) and we all bicker about where we stand and who goes next to who. I remember when it involved me holding baby number one - my brother, baby number two - my cousin Joe, right up until the twinnies arrived.
I hope that all of my family knows how much I love them, and that my cousins and my brother, in particular, know that their big cousin/sister Charlotte, will always be their big cousin/sister - the one that fed them bottles, the one that played games, the one that sang with them, the one that probably taught them how to be just that little bit cheeky, and the one who is like…super proud of them.
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